Questions and Answers!
Obsession with eating the “right” food
I found your website through your YouTube channel. I have read all the Abraham-Hicks books and believe everything in theory in regards to the Law Of Attraction but I am having trouble apply the principles to my life.
Over the past year or so I’ve really developed symptoms of an eating disorder. I’m 22 years old and around 9 stone. I realize I am not anorexic and I’m not bulimic or massively overweight but I have an obsession with eating the ‘right’ food and trying to control everything I eat.
I used to weigh about 3 stone more than I do now and while I lost the weight gradually and healthily, I feel like I’m still not satisfied with where I am and I’m always eating from the perspective of needing to lose weight. I also feel guilty if I haven’t done a certain amount of physical activity during the day. I have an office job that I don’t particularly enjoy so I find I spend a lot of time thinking about food or my next meal, I suppose as something to look forward to. I find myself getting worried about feeling hungry enough for my next meal because I’ve picked up beliefs that I should never eat when I’m not hungry otherwise I’ll gain weight. Sometimes this makes me put off eating so that I’m definitely hungry when I eat, or if I eat and know I’m going home to have dinner then I’ll feel bad about it.
I hate it when someone has a birthday at work because I feel pressured to have a cake which I don’t really want. I know I pay too much attention to what or how much other people eat to try and justify why they look a certain way when I know it’s not about that. Recently, I’ve had a real thing about trying not to eat carbs at every meal, which sometimes makes planning meals quite stressful. It all came to a head when I went on holiday with my family and I couldn’t eat the normal foods I eat and were going out for meals where I couldn’t see the menu first. Sometimes I would get emotional and feel like crying and it really affected the holiday.
I know it’s not about the food and is a symptom of something deeper so I tried counseling and had four sessions before feeling like it wasn’t really helping. She was looking at the issue from a very black and white point of view. I basically want to be able to really enjoy all types of food, not have to plan what I’m eating and when, enjoy social gatherings involving food, not worry what others are thinking about my body or how much/little I am eating in relation to my size and maintain a slim figure without vigorous exercise.
Sorry if this is a bit rambly, I just wanted to get it all down! I’m considering seeing a doctor to see what services they can recommend but I thought I would try this option first. I look forward to hearing your advice 🙂
I am happy you found me and thank you for contacting me and sharing your story/problem with me!
It’s really good that your eating is not that much out of control! It means it’s easier to put things in order for you! I am really glad you see your problem and taking care of yourself in the beginning stage and not letting things escalate into a more extreme problem before looking for a solution! It means you have a great self-awareness and taking a good care of yourself! 🙂
So from from you have written seems you have a quite a healthy weight and you are not desperate to lose weight, but would like to keep it off, or lose just a little bit more, but especially to keep it at least as it is and you find it difficult as you have to always watch and be careful what you eat. This makes it for you very stressful and it is making you thinking and obsessing about food more than you would enjoy. You feel not much in your power when people are offering you food and trying to push you to eat etc. Also when you eat, you think you need to compensate by exercising or eating certain foods only and avoid some others.
Also, you mentioned, that you believe that you can only eat when you are hungry, otherwise you would gain weight and this makes you sometimes question or doubt if you are hungry enough to eat.
I teach 2 steps of achieving complete eating freedom and slim body for life:
1. Getting back to Natural Way of Eating
2. Getting back to Your Natural State of Being!
These are my recommendation for you:
1. From Natural Way of Eating perspective and how you get back to it:
If we were eating the Natural Way, we don’t need to control anything! But what majority of people consider being a “normal eating” is not natural at all! That’s why not many people are free around food in this society. But it does not matter, as we can always get back to it!
Natural way Of Eating is when you ONLY listen to OUR BODY’S SIGNAL and nothing else. When you are in complete alignment with your body. In this way you never put on weight, you enjoy food and are in complete freedom, power, and ease.
The Problem in this society is that we stopped listening to our bodies and its internal signals/rules and start listening to external rules-what to eat, how much, when, that food has calories, certain nutrients etc. All these things are completely irrelevant, but we were tricked that this matter. Well, this matter only when we stop listening to our body because THEN we have no choice but to CONTROL things.
Our body knows exactly WHEN to eat – it gives you signal-I am hungry!
Our body knows exactly HOW MUCH food it needs – it gives you a signal-I am satisfied.
Our body knows exactly WHAT to eat- it tells you by the way it TASTE when you eat it and FEEL in your body AFTER you have eaten it.
Your body wants to move, is designed to move. But not for compensating or losing weight, but just for a pure enjoyment and necessity or better said-optimal experience of your body.
You said you believe you should only eat when hungry! This is REALLY good belief and AWESOME! It’s great that you listen to it, but the problem there for you is, that you don’t trust it that much (your body and its signals and you don’t listen all the signal, only some of that, so you still don’t experience ease, so you need to be in CONTROL.
I recommend you to start practicing listening to your own body’s wisdom and forget for some time(or forever 😉 ) about any other external rules about food (calories, nutrition,bad or good food, healthy or unhealthy, low or high calories etc)
So what to listen:
1. When you are hungry – give your body a food!
Notice when you are hungry, how much hungry you are. When you are just a little bit hungry-eat just a little bit of food. When you are quite hungry, eat according to your hunger level.
2. Eat what you WANT not what you think you should eat!
Notice how the food tastes if YOU like it (not if it’s low cal, low fat, healthy, junk etc)-When you don;t enjoy some food – don’t eat it! Eat only what taste good to YOU. Your taste buds KNOWS. Your SENSES KNOWS.
and how it feels in your body after you have eaten it (do you feel bloated, heavy, sluggish, light, energetic?When you notice that your body KNOWS what is GOOD for YOU, you will listen naturally and won’t eat food that makes you feel bad. But we are desensitized as we trained ourselves to EAT what THEY say we should eat.
3. Consciously, deliberately, Enjoy every mouthful!
When you eat, be present, don’t be distracted by TV, reading,phone etc as you won’t be able to listen to BODY’s SIGNALS when it will tell you STOP, I am satisfied now, thank you!
I recommend for this (when practicing to listen to your body) to CLOSE YOUR EYES while eating (if you can).
This will also help you to ENJOY food, get all pleasure of the food,so you don’t need another piece because you didn’t even feel the first one properly (let’s say chocolate etc)
4. When you are satisfied, stop eating!
Listen to your body (with eyes closed while practicing) and feel, notice how yu are gradually becoming fuller and fuller until the sense of pleasant satisfaction. When you reach the point of pleasant satisfaction, stop eating and notice how amazing you feel. You feel like you have enough, fulfilled. The food starts to taste worse beyond this point,so you naturally wouldn’t even want to eat.
When you listen only to your OWN BODY, you won’t need to ever COMPENSATE, because you body will let you know when you need fuel (food), how much and which one.
So if you eat only how much your body needs, you won’t ever gain weight again.
Also, your body wants to move, but for a pure enjoyment of it as our bodies have muscles etc! Try to move your body in the way you enjoy it (dancing etc.) There will be nothing to compensate once you listen to your body completely and when you experience you CAN TRUST IT again. (to your body and its signals).
2. From the point of Getting back to YOUR Natural State of Being:
Practice being in you POWER
Listen to your own bodies signals gives you amazing feeling if alignment and being in power or in balance. When people will offer you food (birthday cake etc) and if you are not hungry, but you like the cake, take it and tell them you are gonna keep it for later because you are not hungry at the moment and eat it later when hungry. If you don’t like the cake, just say, thank you I don’t like this cake. You will become more confident soon to let people know what is natural: I am not hungry now, will eat later. Or I don’t like this taste. I prefer different cake, etc.
Have CONFIDENCE in your BODY. Practice. Notice!
What is strange is- eat when you are not hungry or food you don’t like. Or eat mindless that you don’t even remember eating. Or eat much more than your body is telling you to eat. Normal is- eat when you are hungry.Normal is LISTENING to your OWN BODY.
In term of LAW of Attraction: visualize, see yourself as completely free around food and naturally slim. See yourself listening completely to your body’s signals and being in amazing ease and alignment with your body. See yourself practiced there and eating completely the natural way when you eat for pleasure, nourishment, fuel and self-love and food never makes you fat or gain weight.
Food does not make us fat or gain weight. Only when we eat when we don’t need fuel or eat more than our body need we will. Or when we eat food that does not feel and taste good while eating or after digesting.
I hope this will help you and that it is clear enough!
If you don’t understand anything, I can be even clearer, just let me know!
To your complete eating freedom, slim body for life and your own personal power and confidence!
Fear Of Weight Gain
I have suffered from various of eating disorder since I was 13. I am now 34. Finally, I confronted my problem this year and committed Myself to recovery. The hardest thing for me now is to overcome the fear of weight gain and getting fat if I eat normally.
I am really happy that you have started your recovery journey.
Fear of gaining weight is a big deal for many people, and you have a great courage to go for a recovery even with this fear. It means your recovery is your priority now, and you decided you are worth it to yourself!
I don’t know exactly what your “recovery” looks like, but I understand that you want both: to recover for life from an eating disorder/challenges and to be slim for life.
I remember I wanted both in one: complete eating freedom and slim body for life. I didn’t want just one or the other.
Many recovery treatments/programs are based on managing/getting some level of control of an eating disorder and weight but do not give you complete eating freedom and slim body for life.
Even it is like this, they still can be a great “stepping stones” to full recovery.
I can tell you that achieving complete eating freedom and slim body for life is real, and it is relatively easy. I have achieved that and want to share this message and principles.
I have to say that unfortunately by “eating normally” you will very likely gain some weight.
That’s the way I am not a fan of “eating normally” at all.
Eating “normally”, hmm, it really depends on what you mean by that.
But I have a good news for you:
What a majority of people call “eating normally” is not “natural way of eating” at all.
I teach getting back to “Natural Way of Eating” when you listen only to your body’s signals and yourself. It’s a natural state when you are completely “connected to your body or in tune with your body”. In this way, you can eat whatever you want and stay slim or lose weight. Food won’t make you fat ever again.
The majority of people are disconnected from their bodies and instead of listening to their internal body’s “rules” they listen to external rules (what food to eat, how much, when, according to some diets or experts).
So many people are overweight and putting on weight, and they don’t have what we would call an eating disorder. They eat “normally” but they are putting on weight.
“Eating normally” is NOT a “natural way of eating.” You will very likely put some weight on by “Eating Normally”(listening to external rules instead of internal signals of our body).
I have a good news for you: it is possible to eat anything you want and be slim forever.
The opposite of an eating disorder is Natural Way Of Eating. There is a scale in between.
The more you are guided away (further) from Natural Way Of Eating (NWE), the more you are closer to an eating disorder. The majority of people are guided away from NWE in some way, but it is not that extreme, so they don’t call it an eating disorder, and also the consequences are not that bad.
I achieved complete eating freedom (I eat everything I want, I am completely eating disorder free) and slim body for life. This is not just for some lucky people. This is the natural state and for everyone.
My formula for achieving complete eating freedom and slim body for life has 2 steps:
Getting back to Natural Way of Eating
Getting Back To Natural State Of Being
I am explaining all 2 steps and all about The Natural Way of Eating and how to get back from an eating disorder to “natural way of eating” in my upcoming book.
But for now, I can explain some simple basic here:
Your body needs fuel(food) to exist and to be alive. And your body knows WHEN it needs fuel/food and how much and what kind of food. Our bodies give us signals. When it needs fuel, it gives you a signal that it is hungry. Your body knows exactly how much food it needs, and it gives you a signal that it is satisfied. Our bodies have senses and give us signals by our senses and body’s feelings whether the food we eat taste good, smell good, look good and feel good in our bodies after eating or not.
No one knows when YOUR body is hungry, except your body! Your body will tell you! Even we don’t know when we will be hungry, but our bodies tell us.
This is listening to our internal body’s guidance. No expert, doctor, best friend, president, the queen, your partner, etc don’t know WHEN YOUR body will be hungry and HOW MUCH FOOD it will need for that particular time and WHAT FOOD will taste and feel good in YOUR body.
Only Your Body Knows!
As you can see, only our bodies are the only experts, and they will give us signals about its needs.
So you can see that any diets and advice on what to eat, how much and when is completely irrelevant and not applicable. Each person is individual and unique.
There is nothing like one size fits all. But this is what society teaches:
Follow this diet and you will lose weight. Eat this food and don’t eat this one and you will be healthy or slim.
It is not working and not true.
This is all about stopping to listen to your body (the only expert on when, how much and what to eat) and starting to listen to all external rules of the experts and the society. So then we don’t eat when we are hungry, we eat food that we don’t want, we eat when we are not hungry etc.
You can see that listening all these external rules about eating and food cause PROBLEMS. It is just a question of time when our body stop working properly (starting to put on weight) and our eating start to be out of order.
Eating dis-order= eating is OUT of ORDER.
That’s why I say, it is relatively easy to get back from an eating disorder to Natural Way of Eating (getting back to alignment with your own body and your internal guidance- regarding physiology and also our intuition) and be eating disorder free and naturally healthy slim for life.
I go into depth about this in my upcoming book.
I hope this will give some basic understanding and the hope and re-assurance that you can have it all:
complete eating freedom AND naturally slim body for life.
If you have any other questions or if it’s not clear, just write me an email.
I wish you all the best, stay in touch and let me know your updates.
I don’t have an ED but as I was searching for stuff around eating for health I came across your work, mainly what I was reading was sports nutrition as well as the other diet fads (I’m familiar with all of them), didn’t follow the majority of that stuff as it didn’t feel right to me. I guess what I was searching all along was the Natural Way of Eating!
I’m not concerned about weight that much but I want to feel good and look sexy (like you) and obviously have ups and downs. I do have this habit with me from 2-3 years ago to count the food(protein/carbs/fats) in my head and make sure I don’t undereat or overeat, but I want to let go of that fluff and be healthy! (and sexy!)
When I choose food I try and go with what I feel like eating (predominately whole foods) but I’m always thinking, is this too much? Or too little?
Will this help me optimize health? ( the main problem I have is a varicose vein in my calf from when I was 17, I’m 23 now, for which there are only surgical methods of removal, but I have personally seen them shrinking at times and trust that it can be healed when the body is in balance).
So I am feeling confused, out of control, uncomfortable – thinking if this is the right amount/food – and I feel like it’s a perpetuating cycle that those emotions are what might be causing my health to not be where it should be, but I have them because I am where I am right now.
I am glad you don’t have ED, just some slight version of eating issues. You are doing well! 🙂
I think the main problem what I see from your email is in trust in your body to tell you what it needs, when and how much.
You will really find the free training useful (I saw that you signed up) about the Natural Way Of Eating (NWE) (partnership with your body).
Basically, what happens is that we are conditioned or programmed to listen to external advice instead of our own and our own body. So let’s say, we want to be fit and healthy, so we listen to sports nutrition advice. We have so much information, we know a lot!
However, this big knowledge can cause some harm/ disconnection from our body as we learn to listen/trust and rely on this “nutrition information (carbs, calories, fat, nutrition etc) instead of our own body. After a while, we desensitize to our own body’s sensations and signals.
That’s why you are not sure how much food you should eat, as you either don’t feel the sensation of your body (the feeling od satisfaction, fullness when you are pleasantly satisfied) or you don’t trust it because you don’t trust your body (that it has its own wisdom and is guiding you).
Generally, we learn to not trust to our bodies as we think and experience that our body: put on weight and want all “bad foods”. This is however only because we disconnected from our body and our body is not functioning properly. These are consequences of us being guided away from NWE. Consequences of NOT partnering with our bodies.
Also, generally, we learn to NOT trust to ourselves, our own wisdom, but to doctors, experts, people with qualification, more experience and education and we trust them, rely on them and take their info as the ultimate truth (or the general knowledge).
So basically what we are doing is: we let others tell us what our body suppose to eat, how much, when, how frequently etc INSTEAD of feeling OUR own body. No one is an expert on your BODY, only YOU. Basically, ONLY your body knows what it wants and needs, when, how much.
This is so individual that NO ONE can know what is good for your specific body, ONLY YOUR OWN BODY.
Afer listening to external information and not to our body, then we disconnect from this partnership with our body and as the result, we desensitize (we don’t feel the body’s signals and sensations so much) and we don’t trust it or partner with our bodies. We partner with external advice or knowledge.
So in your case, for example, I can see that you follow the sport/nutrition knowledge and not your own body. Because of this, you don’t feel sure how much you should eat. Maybe you are slightly desensitized to your “I am satisfied” signal, maybe you are used to trusting to external knowledge and not your own body’s sensation or you don’t trust your body (or don’t know how) that is guiding you to the most beneficial food for you/your body at that moment.
I would recommend you to just start to partner with your body better and rely more on your body.
Basically, our body and ONLY our body knows WHEN exactly it needs fuel, energy, food. It knows exactly WHAT food taste best for you (what foods you enjoy through your senses the most and what food taste the best in your body when you eat it). And your body knows exactly HOW MUCH food it needs at that specific moment. It knows also WHAT nutrients needs from food. It will guide you (by feeling that you WANT, feel like eating certain foods) and not others.
So you see, a doctor, an expert cannot HAVE this information from your body, ONLY you HAVE it, by feeling the body’s sensations, your body’s reactions to food. It requires full partnership and attunement to your body.
Your body will train you what to eat. Basically, some food can taste great through your senses-taste buds, and also feel great after you eat it. But some can still taste good in your mouth, but when you eat it, you feel not good in your body. Sluggish, sleepy, heavy. Or on a contrary, energetic, light, great! Based on this, your body will train you what food is GOOD for you. What food you like, as YOU, Dimitrije, with your type of body at that moment.
Also many times we eat what we don’t really enjoy because we believe from external resources that it is healthy or help us to lose weight etc. Then we can desensitize to our taste buds and we would feel pleasure deficiency and would crave this “taste pleasure” from other food (usually junk food) because we don’t experience enough pleasure satisfaction in form of taste. Our body and we want to compensate for this lack of taste and sensual pleasure.
The more you listen to your body, or you are attuned to it, in full partnership (listening t it’s body’s signals, sensations), the more you become an expert on YOURSELF and WHAT TO EAT, how much, when etc. and confident in yourself.
Even we don’t know when will be hungry next time, how much food we will need and what would taste good for us. ONLY our BODY knows this. It is unique to You and also to specific moments. Sometimes our body needs more food, sometimes less, sometimes you like some food, other time it dos do not taste good, or does not feel good in your body. It really is very individual and changes all the time according to your own needs, situation, evolution, healing, etc.
So getting back to this partnership with our bodies is an AMAZING thing. Then we don’t need any external info to rely on. We have our OWN internal info that is specifically designed for YOU-as unique human being-Dimitrije.
I will be teaching how to get back to this partnership in video 2 of that FREE Training.
You are doing really great, you are not that much disconnected from your body. So it will be easy for you to make some small adjustments to get back to the full partnership. You still have some level of partnership with your body. That’s awesome. So you need just slight fine tuning and will be fine.
Also with your health, you noticed about your leg/vein, that sometimes it is worse and sometimes better. Full partnership with your body and full attunement to your body’s sensation will only help with your leg as well. As our body is guiding us to our optimal health also. And you will know what to do. You will get inspiration about what to do about your leg.
You still have a quite good connection to your inner guidance and also your body’s internal guidance. And you listen what feels good to you and what not. You can trust yourself that you will get the guidance about what to do.
Hope this helped in some way and I am sure that the free training will be helpful too!
Hi, Elena. I’m from Brazil, so forgive me if my English is not very good. I discovered your channel on Youtube and then your site. I identified myself in your words. Since I was a child I have had a problem with weight and I believe that everything else in my life has a problem too because of that. I already read a lot of things about diet, and because of that, I don’t know what is the right anymore. My mind is a complete mess about this subject! Besides, your video about having value touched me deeply because I can’t found my self-worth just because I am who I am.
I already read all your free materials, and I’m so thank you for sharing this. But, I can’t discover yet what is blocking me. I feel like I would be arrested in my body and in a lifestyle that are not my own. While I’m writing here, I want to cry, but I can’t, because the tears don’t flow and my throat is closed.
I hope you can understand my English and my explanation and have some to tell me that help me. Every time you say “recover” I feel hope for me too. I don’t want to load the label of Obesity anymore neither the obsession for foods or diets.
Thank you for your attention and patience.
Hello! Hhi to Brazil!
Thank you for contacting me! I can understand your English, no worries! 🙂
Yes, when we have body and eating problems, it affects all other areas of our lives.
My approach has 2 steps: (you probably already know 🙂
1. Getting back to Natural Way of Eating (NWE) (putting the eating disorder back in order)
2. Getting back to your Natural State Of Being (NSB) (healing the reason why you have developed the eating and weight issues).
In this mini coaching, I will be helping you to get closer to these 2 steps and with the blocks.
1. Getting back to Natural Way of Eating (putting the eating disorder back in order)
It seems like you diet and then overeat?You are not mentioning very much about your eating, only that you have extra weight.
Diets do not work for permanent weight loss and they just mess up your eating so then you cannot lose weight for that you develop eating and food obsessions and all is even worse.
I can only recommend getting back to NWE when you listen to your body completely:
1. Eat when you are hungry
2. Eat everything that you want
3. Stop when satisfied
4. Eat slowly and consciously so you can prolong the taste and feel more.
But this is not something that you can do one time or sometimes to be effective.
You will have to train yourself at least for 30 days to do only these 4 steps and by this, you will get back to NWE for life. I wrote everything in my book and how exactly to get back to NWE, the training process. Also, any other teacher, coach or resources that teach how to listen to your body is helpful.
By this, you will lose eating disorder (any level or degree you have), so you won’t be binging, overeating, eating for emotional reasons or have food addiction anymore etc.
2. Getting back to your Natural State of Being:
I think, that there is something stopping you from losing weight and recovery. In other words, you are not ready, because there is a need to work on some of your emotional or mental blocks or issues.
“But, I can’t discover yet what is block me. I feel like I would be arrested in my body and in a lifestyle that are not my own. While I’m writing here, I want to cry, but I can’t, because the tears don’t flow and my throat is closed.”
It shows that you are not identifying with who you are right now (overweight body, eating problems) and are rejecting this part of you as a way to get what you want. We do it many times, we think we need to reject, say no, protest, disown that part of us or situation that is unwanted, in order to get what we want.
For this, you could do the exercise as in my video about value-find peace with the scenario that you would never recover and lose weight and that you still could be happy. When you make peace with that scenario or life option, there is no resistance in you, a strong rejection of the reality and then you will move forward to the future (recovery and weight loss) easily.
It’s the energy: I only want you with slim body and recovered, but not overweight and with disordered eating.
If you feel like this, then you will sabotage yourself as you want to prove that it is not right and you have value slim or not slim.
You can re-watch the 2nd video in 6 Reasons why you don’t want to recover even you think yo want to (Rebellion against conditional love) Video Course.
It’s just the question of doing those exercises.
You said you don’t know yet, what are your blocks.
To find out what is your block:
1. Ask yourself a question:
Why cannot I lose weight?
What is the first answer that comes to your mind? That is a clue for you!
2. In case, you asked this and have nothing, no answer, or your answer is “I don’t know”, then ask yourself this:
And if I did know, what it would be?
This is a trick question for our subconscious mind. Our Soul always knows what is the problem and what to do, but we don’t want to listen because then we would have to take action and many times we are scared to change. So we rather say: “I don’t know.”
Then you mentioned that you want to cry but you cannot, that your throat is closed.
This is a very good indicator about blockage in self-expression, in speaking your truth, your inner world of feelings, emotions and thoughts.
This indicates a big blockage that you have so many things left unexpressed inside of you, suppressed feelings and no way to express and speak them up. So many things unsaid.
Maybe you experienced some dramatic past traumas when little as you mentioned that you were overweight from your childhood already. Maybe something happened, you felt unsafe and since then, you were not able to express your feelings, feel or speak about what is going in your inner world, so you used food as a way to suppress it.
If you experienced some trauma, in order to heal, you need to get it into light: start talking about it, start feeling it, start sharing it. In this way, you unblock this energy that is blocked and cannot flow.
If you didn’t experience any big trauma that you can remember, trauma has many forms.
When we are little and our psyche and self-concept are just forming, even this is a big trauma:
you told something to your parents, friends and they rejected you and told you are weird, unacceptable.
Or you expressed some feelings: excitement, anger, sadness, happiness, grief, rage and you were not accepted but shamed for your feelings.
Or you were sharing your thoughts, inner world with someone, and that person didn’t get you, so you felt like you are alone and no one can understand you, you felt the disconnection
All these things can be traumas when we are little. And can make us decide that it is not SAFE, acceptable, normal, to share your feelings, feel the feelings, speak your truth, share your ideas etc and then we stop and keep all inside of us.
When this happens then something will go wrong with us, because this is not our natural state and our energy is not flowing through us, is blocked, so it will create something dysfunctional, like addictions, disorders etc.
I recommend you to start to be more open, authentic, share more of your inner world. It does not have to be about eating and food, about anything.
The sign that you can not cry, means that you have a big reason to don’t show emotions, weakness, as it was unacceptable and almost “killed” you when little. This protective control that won’t let you cry is very strong that even you feel you want to cry, it won’t allow you to feel freely the emotions or to go to that emotional pain.
There is a whole movement of people that is into authenticity-being openly who you are, sharing everything that you can.This is very healing. Because we suppose to be free to be who we are, not blocked or to hide.
Find a safe space, where you can express yourself, especially by WORDS, as your throat was closed, it means WORDS needs to be said. Some people express themselves through art etc, but throat is about WORDS.
Start to write a private personal diary about what is really going on inside, in your inner world, not surface level.
Read stories of other people, maybe their eating disorder stories and body weight stories and recoveries, so you feel you can relate to them and get the courage to start to share too.
Share you story somewhere. There are many places where you can share your story in private.
It is very healing to do so!
Many people who are helping with eating and weight, have on their websites communities or a page where you can write your story.
I have a private FB group for people who wants to heal by sharing their stories.
It is here:https://www.facebook.com/groups/545653378955173/
You can read my story here:http://www.eatingfreedom-bodyfreedom.com/eating-recovery-story/
I recommend you some videos of Teal Swan, don’t know if you heard of her: she specialize in emotional healing and she is a great example of authenticity (she write amazing open blogs what she is going through) and she has videos how to express your emotions and speak your truth.
her youtube channel: a video about how to start feeling
About your recovery:
You CAN recover and you WILL recover. You have a desire to recover and be slim. Where there is a desire, the problem, there is a solution too. Having eating and weight problem is NOT our natural state. It is a learned behavior. And we can always get back to our natural state, free of eating and weight problems.
However, you need to take actions towards your recovery and try many things. This is something that you are already doing, so great!!
And especially try different things that you were doing.
Try, apply and try and apply. It takes the time to get into the place when we are ready to recover fully. But getting closer is amazing too. Never give up!!! There is a solution for you and your soul will guide you. Will give you stepping stones until you are fully recovered. Just listen to your soul and take action on it.
For example, getting this mini coaching is listening to your soul and taking action, so you are very good at listening and following your heart and soul. Our Higher Self knows better how far or close we are to full recovery and guiding us there. So never give up!!! Eating freedom and slim body IS possible for YOU! Just a few years ago, I had no idea I will be able to eat anything and stay slim forever! And it is the reality now for me. And it is the natural state of our mind and body to be free from eating disorder and be naturally slim for life.
Also that you said Yes to posting your question on my public page is amazing sign that you are close to recovery as you don’t feel such a big amount of shame for your situation. You know many people said no, because they don’t feel comfortable to have their question posted on my website and it is even anonymous! So this is amazing that you feel fine with it and authentic.
1. With diets you will never lose weight permanently and you will develop and intensify your eating disorder/issues;
Recommendation: get back to NWE-listening to your body-the 4 body needs-signals.
The best way to get back to NWE is to do it for 30 days. I have my book: Lose Weight and Eating Disorder Forever where is step by step process how to do it.
There are other books and resources too. Go and find them.
2. Discover what your blocks are with the questions I offered you and then go after solutions and take action.
I recommend you to do a lot in expressing yourself speaking “your truth”, sharing who you are, your inner world: it seems as this is blocked and keeps you not moving forward to recovery.Unblock yourself.Words are important for you. Be seen, heard and felt by other people. Try to share with your friends more, hide less.
Be around people who are authentic, open, courageous to talk about their personal truth. Find groups online where you can do it also. To get inspired to be open, read other people’s stories. Start to write a diary of your inner world.
If this is helpful and you would like some more help or recommendations from me, you can write me again.
Thank you for writing me and watching my videos!
You are getting closer and closer to full recovery. And then it will just happen. Keep going!
Elena Orchiday xo
Achieve Eating Freedom And A Slim Body For Life!
“LOSE WEIGHT AND YOUR EATING DISORDER FOREVER!” e-Book!
Why losing only weight, when you can lose weight AND your eating disorder in one!
If you suffer from eating disorders (binge eating, yo-yo dieting, emotional eating, food addiction, bulimia, starving), you cannot lose weight as your eating is out of order!
What to do? I have to 2 steps for you:
1. Get back to the Natural Way Of Eating (so you lose your eating disorder).
2. Get back to your Natural State of Being (so you lose the reason why you have developed your eating disorder).
Lose Weight AND Your Eating Disorder forever!
Gain Eating Freedom and a Slim Body for Life!